It's 1.15 am.
Which means it's already the last day of year 2010.
hmnnn..2010 is full of memories.
of?
Well, I get to go to Suju concert, JYJ showcase,
lots of happenings in school (both good and bad),
tuitions, co-curriculum and STPM.
Somehow, I don't really find 2010 a very pleasing year.
or maybe im not in a good mood right now
Yesterday, the same thought came to me again.
I suddenly felt so loss..
I started to wonder again who am I actually.
I felt like I'm a stranger to myself.
Like I'm trying to get to know me.
Isn't it strange that humans function with only their minds?
It scares me somehow.
It's like you are you because of your mind and not your body or anything else...but this...this mind..is not really a thing is it?
and I don't think you can control it much..
I realized I have many worries/fears too..
not that I will reveal them.
And it's hard to live for other people.
Cares too much of other people's feelings,
trying not to offence them..
taking actions that will not hurt them.
Helping them as much as I could. I really don't mind the helping part..
but sometimes,
sometimes it just hurts when I don't get back the same treatment.
Why is it everytime I have to be the one who tolerate and care for other people's feeling but not the other way round.
It would be good if it's mutual.
I know whoever reading this would think I'm finding my own skin pain or that I'm thinking too good of myself...not true!
Maybe I just hate fights. I can't stand it when people starts to argue/shouts.
Another thing learnt,
When you thought you are right,
you MIGHT NOT be right in OTHER people's POINT OF VIEW.
or rephrasing it,
Even it is wrong,
it is not wrong to that person.
It really depends on how a person look at it.
We just need to learn how to respect people's POV/decisions.
And sometimes, it is best to just keep your thoughts to yourself.
Lastly,
working in Digi for almost 2 weeks now.
Made mistakes and I feel bad *arghhh*
Explain myself I would seem like I'm giving excuses
and pushing the blame to other people.
Only solution, keep quiet and go on.
The thought of escaping alone a while is so tempting..
Which means it's already the last day of year 2010.
hmnnn..2010 is full of memories.
of?
Well, I get to go to Suju concert, JYJ showcase,
lots of happenings in school (both good and bad),
tuitions, co-curriculum and STPM.
Somehow, I don't really find 2010 a very pleasing year.
or maybe im not in a good mood right now
Yesterday, the same thought came to me again.
I suddenly felt so loss..
I started to wonder again who am I actually.
I felt like I'm a stranger to myself.
Like I'm trying to get to know me.
Isn't it strange that humans function with only their minds?
It scares me somehow.
It's like you are you because of your mind and not your body or anything else...but this...this mind..is not really a thing is it?
and I don't think you can control it much..
I realized I have many worries/fears too..
not that I will reveal them.
And it's hard to live for other people.
Cares too much of other people's feelings,
trying not to offence them..
taking actions that will not hurt them.
Helping them as much as I could. I really don't mind the helping part..
but sometimes,
sometimes it just hurts when I don't get back the same treatment.
Why is it everytime I have to be the one who tolerate and care for other people's feeling but not the other way round.
It would be good if it's mutual.
I know whoever reading this would think I'm finding my own skin pain or that I'm thinking too good of myself...not true!
Maybe I just hate fights. I can't stand it when people starts to argue/shouts.
Another thing learnt,
When you thought you are right,
you MIGHT NOT be right in OTHER people's POINT OF VIEW.
or rephrasing it,
Even it is wrong,
it is not wrong to that person.
It really depends on how a person look at it.
We just need to learn how to respect people's POV/decisions.
And sometimes, it is best to just keep your thoughts to yourself.
Lastly,
working in Digi for almost 2 weeks now.
Made mistakes and I feel bad *arghhh*
Explain myself I would seem like I'm giving excuses
and pushing the blame to other people.
Only solution, keep quiet and go on.
The thought of escaping alone a while is so tempting..
Life..
what is life?
no one actually understands me
not even my family.
that's weird...no?
:)
what is life?
no one actually understands me
not even my family.
that's weird...no?
:)
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