December 31st, 2010

It's 1.15 am.
Which means it's already the last day of year 2010.
hmnnn..2010 is full of memories.
of?
Well, I get to go to Suju concert, JYJ showcase,
lots of happenings in school (both good and bad),
tuitions, co-curriculum and STPM.
Somehow, I don't really find 2010 a very pleasing year.
or maybe im not in a good mood right now

Yesterday, the same thought came to me again.
I suddenly felt so loss..
I started to wonder again who am I actually.
I felt like I'm a stranger to myself.
Like I'm trying to get to know me.
Isn't it strange that humans function with only their minds?
It scares me somehow.
It's like you are you because of your mind and not your body or anything else...but this...this mind..is not really a thing is it?
and I don't think you can control it much..


I realized I have many worries/fears too..
not that I will reveal them.
And it's hard to live for other people.
Cares too much of other people's feelings,
trying not to offence them..
taking actions that will not hurt them.
Helping them as much as I could. I really don't mind the helping part..
but sometimes,
sometimes it just hurts when I don't get back the same treatment.
Why is it everytime I have to be the one who tolerate and care for other people's feeling but not the other way round.
It would be good if it's mutual.
I know whoever reading this would think I'm finding my own skin pain or that I'm thinking too good of myself...not true!
Maybe I just hate fights. I can't stand it when people starts to argue/shouts.


Another thing learnt,

When you thought you are right,
you MIGHT NOT be right in OTHER people's POINT OF VIEW.

or rephrasing it,

Even it is wrong,
it is not wrong to that person.

It really depends on how a person look at it.
We just need to learn how to respect people's POV/decisions.
And sometimes, it is best to just keep your thoughts to yourself.


Lastly,
working in Digi for almost 2 weeks now.
Made mistakes and I feel bad *arghhh*
Explain myself I would seem like I'm giving excuses
and pushing the blame to other people.
Only solution, keep quiet and go on.

The thought of escaping alone a while is so tempting..

Life..
what is life?
no one actually understands me
not even my family.
that's weird...no?
:)

Will be BACK blogging in
MID DECEMBER..
if i'm still alive

running out of time,
yet, im making no effort.
i pray..

18th March 2010!
a day to remember!~
well..not bout my 1st sis birthday..
but
WINNING CONCERT TICKETS to
SUPER JUNIOR SUPER SHOW 2 CONCERT in MALAYSIA.
it's on 20th March 2010
well..i entered a slogan competition via AstroLife :-

"I love watching Channel [V] because..
channel [V] brings me a [V]ariety of songs from a
[V]ariety of genres with a di[V]ersity of artists. "
(20 words, 100 alphabets)

was in PA tuition when i received a message notifying i won. *smiles*
phoned my second sis to inform her since she helped me to EDIT the slogan..
and so..yea. WE WON!
never been so lucky in our lives.

♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

did not plan to go the concert at all
but since we won the tickets..[hope it's not a scam o.o]
and my parents agreed to let me go..
YESH!
bye bukit mertajam for two days.. [=

ps: im going with my second sis cause she wants to go for...cause she just wants to.
although she don't know any of the SUJU members! o.o

pss : *shiet..my homeworks and all the things i need to do!! MOAN!*

never been this lucky..
still i miss the FIVE of you though.

i can't help it when..
my mind just decide to FLY away from time to time!
well i can say most of the time =.=
was doing a MUET comprehension yesterday and there's this article on
PROCRASTINATION BLUES
well, i cant help but smiled when i read the passage.
cause i'm certainly 'the one' who procrastinate a lot..crap!
i know how wrong and bad it is but just cant seem to shake off the habit.
well..im trying.

repent repent repent!

that's what me and janice been telling to each other.
hhahaha =.=

one week of holidays gonna end soon!
i must achieve a few things by then.
i hope and wish and hope.
gahhh...
*recollect myself*

tomorrow will always come..

Happy Chinese TIGER New Year!

scary yet handsome and cute ♥
i often claim tiger as my hubby whenever i see one on the newspaper. >:]

niway, may everyone has a great tiger year!

to make this post a bit longer..
what i got for last christmas/2009..

bottom and red presents from my second sis
and greenish wrapper from my first sis.

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notebook, pillow and magnetic dolphin from my second sis
and t-shirt from my first sis! (:
it's weird how we don't buy presents for one another bdays but christmas.

oh...not forgetting..

'Donut' from Ms. Lobhie! keke

happy valentine's?

my rotting blog since school life started..hmn.
been going to school for 6days per week since school reopens
(except last week)
busy with the never-ending tuitions and the piling homework.
form 6 can be a suicide!!!
then there's this RC - Research and Coloqium added to our timetable
delaying us from going back till 2.10pm (2.30pm the first few weeks)
it's suppose for the new form six-es.
indirectly, we are the white mice. arghhhhhh
hardly have any time to study or maybe
i have time management prob? o.o
*smack self* do something before it's too late!

still, my soul wants to fly to korea.
reason?
simple...
Musical Mozart!
starring Xiah Kim Jun Su.

love this outfit. or maybe it's on him?
im not that bias am i?! :x

ALL the tickets are sold out
(for all 15 performances he's in!)
and what's worse for me..there wont be a DVD on it. aishh
im hoping for CD/audio at least..
grateful towards the fans who went and managed to record some parts.

although it would be better without all the screaming of fans.
but i don't blame them. haha
video credit: xiah-sshi

love this song! maybe because of it's lyric. or i'm bias!
credit: as tagged. audio:xiah-sshi.com

need my sleep now..
but before that, if anyone is still reading this entry or
reading this blog at all..
i need a tiny help..since CNY is coming..
PLEASE help me COLLECT the RING TABS of TIN CANS.
it's a project of Interact Club.
all the ring tabs collected will be sent to Thailand to make artificial LIMBS!
it's simple and meaningful!

and to Lobhie - Happy Belated Birthday!!
we should celebrate when im less busy (;

i cannot escape my destiny..

FIRST DAY of school..
quite enthusiast together with weiwen in the morning (:
well, it's first day afterall..
got a smaller class and 2 new classmates
(sundrra and lakdesh stopped f6 and go to college instead..
so it'll be 2 go and 2 come. o.o)
anyway, we got our unconfirmed timetable and
our school ends 1.25pm for today..
(didn't know my heart would jump out in a while.)

as usual after school, walked out with weiwen..
heading to our respective cars..
when we both realise that my car is parked far? o.o
BUT we remember clearly that my car is quite near to weiwen's..
as weiwen is getting ready to drive and go fetch her sis, me...walking *look* walking *look*
SHIT. WHERE IS MY CAR? *panic*
and walk back to weiwen's car telling her that my car is GONE.
both of us walk and try to search for my car.

what's in my head that time?
"i'm so dead. i LOST my DAD's CAR. his BELOVED car. and some of my things are in the car! shit shit shit. how am i gonna explain to my dad. is it this morning that someone stole the car. but i DID lock the car...right?"
lent weiwen's handphone and called my dad - voicemail
house phone - no one pick up
and lastly called my first sis...

me : "where's mom? i can't find my car. it's lost"
sis : "*laugh* i took the car la."
me : "SIAO ar u all." blablabla. ( can't remember wat i scolded. i was mad =.=)

so..my sis phoned my mom to inform her to fetch me.
sharoon's mom offered to fetch me back but
declined since my mom will be on her way..
the whole story...my sis proton car can't start in the morning - she needs to go penang for work - toyota car key is in my car peugeot (must be my dad!) - dad was angry but still brought her to take my car (with the extra car key) since my mom will be using the toyota car. and everything without informing me. JUST GREAT.
mom came to fetch me earlier it seems, but since we get to go back at only 1.25pm and she doesnt know..plus the school guard said we can go back at only 2 or 3+pm (the guard obviously don't know anything), so my mom decided to go back first.

as conclusion, i get panic and scared for NO REASON!
kfjbshkgfbsajfdlionafoi SIGH

i'm trying..

5+ hours to back to school life.
i should enjoy right?
it's my FINAL year going school,
wearing uniform, going tuitions.. stress and depress
huffffff..

i will learn to detach.

A Day To Remember..
29th December 2009

beside hard rock hotel..

self-timer is lurve..

before our rm75 games package
(get to lower the price from rm100 to rm75! ^^)

banana boat!

me and veen preparing for our little 'journey'

off we go...
a must play again next time (;

moon represent my heart. ♥
something veen and me made up on the sky

too bad that we didn't take any pics for our jet skiing.

♥ (^^)v

the next day, watched Avatar with my second sis at last!

jusco as always! (:
reached..went to buy tickets but written on the tv..FULL. wth
still..try our luck and ask.
thank god there's still seats left (the first 6 rows)

great movie. i give 10/10 without hesitation! ^^
would love to watch again if i have the chance. probably not..

don't let go too fast but
don't hang on too long..